“Thinking about it, there seems to be no definite perpetrator or victim. You know, there’s a thing called willful negligence. Even knowing that their marriage will be in danger going on like this, there are many couples that don’t put in effort.” – Bo Young

Wow, this show really means business.

It takes a serious topic and is unafraid to delve into the darkest, most provocative corners of it, evoking such deeply personal responses and reflections. When the episode ended, I just paused and contemplated over what I had observed. I even had a conversation with my wife about how we would handle it if either one of us had an affair. Many K-dramas have elicited emotional reactions from me, but none have hit so close to heart as this one.

In this episode, Hyun Woo further descends into anger, despair, loss and pain. He confronts Sun-woo three times, but it’s only in the third that he  musters up the courage to punch him and take revenge by calling Sun-woo’s wife and breaking the news of his adultery to her. This is triggered by Sun-woo’s acceptance of Hyun Woo’s friend request on Facebook, allowing Hyun Woo to see the admiration he receives on Facebook for his beautiful family life. It’s not pretty at all and there’s no attempt to glorify his actions. He does this not because of any noble reason to ensure the wife is not kept in the dark. It is because he hates it that he’s the only one affected by what has happened. It’s unfair that Hyun Woo can retain his happy family whereas his is destroyed. His rage has blinded him to any form of reason; but really, what would a reasoned reaction to being cheated look like? Would a rational reaction be the right kind of reaction?

With Soo Yeon, Hyun Woo is dismissive, curt and explosive. Divorce keeps getting mentioned. He cuts her off when she tries to explain herself. He refuses to accept any of her explanations. He accuses her, calling her the aggressor and him the victim. He blasts her for destroying what they had together.

It’s not possible to say that Hyun Woo’s reactions were wrong; all that I can say is that I would not have reacted the same way as him, because of our different personalities. But I found it difficult to judge him and wonder if I might have reacted in the same way if the same thing happened to me. Having gone through marriage preparation courses and also spoken to friends who are marital counsellors, I know in my mind that divorce shouldn’t be the first option and that the couple should sit down and work things out. The right thing to do would be to exercise mercy and forgiveness, re-examine the marriage, rebuild the trust and move towards reconciliation. But in a way, Hyun Woo’s reactions aren’t wrong either. He’s angry – his wife has betrayed him after 15 years of marriage, and in doing so, also affected their child. Regardless of Soo Yeon’s reasons, her actions have been detrimental to their marriage in a major way. Whether it ultimately does destroy their marriage is a decision both of them have to make and it will be a heartbreaking, difficult journey.

We finally get a more insightful glimpse into Soo Yeon’s perspective in this episode and the most evident point is how isolated and lonely she is. Unlike Hyun Woo who has a band of brothers and a relatively close group of colleagues at work, Soo Yeon’s work environment is cold and distant. She struggles as a working mum, with pressures from both her boss and subordinates. On the home front, she’s working hard too to ensure the best for her son and has to network to negotiate a place for her son in an art class, following which she’s swamped by messages from fellow mums. While we see her perspective, the show ensures that we empathise with her, without necessarily sympathising with her. It’s clear she has done wrong, regardless of her circumstances and how she feels. Throughout the episode, she keeps insisting that this affair is something just between the two of them, but it really isn’t. She’s clearly repentant and wants to make the marriage work, but there’s no way to talk about doing so now, when Hyun Woo is so enraged. The next episode will explore the fall-out further and the show clearly isn’t allowing her to get off scot-free, making her confess the truth to Hyun Woo’s mum – something that Hyun Woo himself has not contemplated.

The show manages to balance the intensity of Hyun Woo and Soo Yeon’s storyline with the antics of Hyun Woo’s production team as well as scenes of Joon Ki’s philandering ways. I do hope the show is going somewhere with Joon Ki’s storyline as it’s getting increasingly ridiculous and no longer funny to see Ara being played around with in such a brutal, callous manner. I did not find any of the Joon Ki sequences funny at all in this episode. However, the Bo Young and Joon-Young storyline fares much better and we finally see the truth behind Joon-Young’s marriage, that his wife left him three days after they got married, which also opens a new angle on this show’s already very competent exploration of difficult issues in marriage.

It’s refreshing to see a drama take such a hard look at a difficult yet real topic in our society today, which seems to be worsening. Dramas like these are much needed and can be potentially powerful to help married couples talk through difficult issues. At this point, my personal wish is for the show to take a more hopeful, redemptive route and show us how Hyun Woo and Soo Yeon eventually work things out and redeem their marriage.

This was a good episode. I haven’t decided whether to follow this series, but if it’s consistently delivering episodes of such quality, then I’m definitely on board till the end. While we do have significant developments plot-wise in this episode, I’d like to start off by highlighting the outstanding production-related aspects of the show.

One thing I enjoy tremendously is the wacky, playful use of camera angles throughout. Director Kim Seok-yoon certainly has a lot of fun placing his cameras at the most quirky places, especially within Hyun Woo’s home. In the previous episode, we had a lovely shot of Hyun Woo from within the helium balloons pointing downwards, with the red balloons framing Hyun Woo’s head. In this episode, we get the camera coming from behind the shelves, from the corridor between the rooms and there’s an interesting frame where the entire frame is dark with Hyun Woo in the shadow except for a spot of light behind him shining on their wedding photograph. Within the confined space of the home, the camera is placed as far as possible from Hyun Woo to make him appear small, signifying how his status within the home has been diminished upon discovering the affair. The constant shifting of angles reinforce his sense of disorientation and loss. It’s such attention to detail that makes the show a delight to watch.

I also liked how food and eating is used as a reflection of the characters and relationships. We get many scenes of our characters having eating. Soo Yeon is often shown setting the table and preparing food, while Hyun Woo and their son dine at the table. Their meals are elaborate, with rice and several dishes as well as a soup or stew. Scenes of their family dining always focus on the three of them and not the individual food items, reinforcing how it’s a communal experience. The warmth and busy-ness that characterises these scenes stand in stark contrast to the scenes when Hyun Woo is alone at home, either with cake splattered all over or drinks on the floor. As for Ah-ra and Yoon-ki, their meals are either in classy restaurants with well-plated cuisine or at home with meticulously prepared one-pot meals. In the scenes of them dining, Ah-ra always takes a picture of the food to post on Instagram, but never of her and Yoon-ki eating together. For the home-cooked meals, we see Ah-ra painstakingly preparing the meals and setting the table alone, while waiting for Yoon-ki to return. They may be dining together, but it certainly is a sterile and cold experience. Then we have Bo Young, who after her divorce no longer bothers to cook meals and explores the range of instant foods available. Eating is a solitary affair for her, merely to fill the tummy, yet she also uses food to convey her concern for others, buying an additional tuna samgak-kimbap for Hyun Woo in this episode – which leads him to suspect she is Tuna Mayo.

Beneath all these stellar production values is also a set of storylines that are developing well. Besides the big revelation of Soo Yeon’s affair, we also see some development in the Bo Young & Joon Young as well as Ah-ra & Joon-Ki’s relationships plus suspicions of Bo-Young being poached. I appreciated how the episode managed to balance all these different storylines together, moving between them seamlessly.

I’m glad we finally see some comeuppance for Joon-Ki who gets horribly tormented when he decides to join a fitness club to leer at the instructors. I do honestly get very uncomfortable watching the scenes of his philandering ways because he truly shows completely no respect to his wife by flirting right in front of her. Hence, I was gleefully laughing at the scenes of him being tortured. He truly deserves it. Bo Young also gets some well-deserved screen time too, beyond just being someone who provides advice. While the dynamics between her and Joon Young are funny, I really hope we get more insight into Joon Young’s marriage. Credits to BoA for playing Bo-Young’s post-divorce state so well and I did feel happy to see her dressing up and going on a blind date.

And last but not least, we finally have the confrontation between Hyun Woo and Soo Yeon, which was mostly well-played. While we found out about the affair, we do not find out very much more, because Hyun Woo is unable to calm himself down when talking to Soo Yeon, which causes her to clam up further. Although Soo Yeon has certainly betrayed Hyun Woo, she deserves a smidgen of credit for her honesty, when she told Hyun Woo that she won’t see the man “for now” and that she missed him. Hyun Woo wavers back and forth on whether to divorce her or not. While on his own and with the Internet forum uses, he’s composed and rational, able to formulate a step-by-step plan and work through his thoughts. However, in front of her, he cannot control his anger, and what starts off as a calm attempt to get her to tell the truth ends up once again with him shouting and losing control.

The forum community plays an important role in Hyun Woo’s journey here and he makes a post whenever he reaches a significant emotional “milestone”, with the final post of the episode being him losing his precious.  To say that the community provides “support” is over-stating it, because the forum posters who provide advice are not truly concerned for him. They are excited and all abuzz over this sensational story that’s happening, but not really for his welfare and his future. This is reinforced by the scene where Hyun Woo walks alone in a crowd of people who are all looking down at their phones, connecting to the forum but not even looking up at him.

Lee Sun-kyun certainly puts in a good performance as Hyun Woo which has been consistent over the past four episodes. His facial expressions and body language are just spot on and even when he is angry and shouting at Soo Yeon, we sympathise with him because we know that anger comes from a mix of disappointment, hurt, fear and brokenness. I’m hoping to see more from Song Ji-hyo though, who thus far has been alright, but we still don’t get enough of her perspective and her emotions. Now that the adultery has come to light, I’m hoping we will get more of a female-voice on the whole matter. Based on the previews for next week, we see Hyun Woo confronting the man and while that’s an interesting turn of events, I do hope Soo Yeon’s voice is not sidelined for too long.

It’s always rewarding to watch a series that has been thoughtfully put together. There’s so much to think about and reflect on, especially for married couples. This is truly a refreshing change from the many other K-dramas I’ve viewed this year!

It’s always good when a drama series causes you to pause and reflect, because it explores such real and serious issues. This could also ironically be the reason why this series may never eventually have high ratings, but I would certainly say that this can be used for marriage enrichment programmes to highlight important things that married couples should think about.

In my review last week, I mentioned that one of the signs of Hyun Woo and Soo Yeon’s marriage falling apart was their lack of honesty with each other and how Hyun Woo chooses to talk to everyone about his wife’s affair instead of asking her directly. This week’s episode offers different perspectives on this, which causes me to empathise with his hesitation.

This episode juxtaposes three characters – Bo Young, Ara and Hyun Woo; all of whom respond differently to their suspicions of their spouses’ affairs.

Bo Young chooses to evade the truth, and builds a wall around her heart to prevent herself from getting hurt. She doesn’t ask her husband about it and eventually ends the marriage, choosing instead to run away from the truth. Ara, on the other hand, acts on her suspicions and checks in on Joon Ki in this episode to verify the truth. While taking so many steps to catch him, it seems as if she is relieved that she has not caught him. To her, the fact that Joon Ki puts in effort not to be caught is a sign that that he still loves her. Hyun Woo shares at the start of the episode that as much as he wants to barge into the hotel to confront Joo Yeon, he is fearful and anxious when he thinks about what will happen next, especially for their son Joo Soon.

Common across all three characters is the fear of confirming their suspicions and confronting the implications. Credit has therefore to be given to the series for being intelligently set up to allow us to see how difficult such a confrontation will be, without actually having to put our main characters through it yet. This is done through the couple whose adultery is captured on film and they have the most uncomfortable conversation ever. The wife brutally tells her husband that there was no reason for her affair – it was just because she loved the man and even more devastatingly, she confesses that she doesn’t need a child and hates the child for looking after her husband.

The matter of simply confronting the truth isn’t simple at all. Once the spouse has been exposed, things become more difficult because the couple now has to confront hard truths and for couples who have been together for a long time, such confrontation involves exposing lies that may have been built up over many years. After such confrontation, then comes the difficult discussion on what to do next, which becomes more complicated when children are involved. Is confrontation the spouse really the best thing to do then? In theory it is, but in reality? There are no easy answers.

While there are no easy solutions, there certainly is no shortage of possible solutions as we see the multitude of opinions that flood in from the forums as well as from Joon-young and Yoon-ki. It’s comforting to see that Hyun-Woo has no shortage of friends who are true brothers-in-arms, always ready to extend a helping hand and even act like a sissy so as to help their friend uncover the truth about his wife’s affair. As for the forum community, I’m not exactly sure where the writers are heading with this, except to display the confusion that can arise when one seeks advice from the Internet. This really isn’t an uncommon phenomenon, though from my observation, it’s usually the women who seek help on such forums and the portrayal in the series is genuine indeed. There are indeed a multitude of opinions coming in, to provide support and solutions. For now, what I see the series doing is emphasising how each voice on the forum arises from different circumstances and settings and hence not always reliable.

Besides the forum, the other “construct” that the series uses to explore the issue of adultery is the TV show that Hyun Woo’s team is producing. Besides what was earlier mentioned, the production of this TV show is put to very intelligent use in this episode as the interview of the man is intercut deftly with responses from Hyun Woo, as if both of them are being interviewed at the same time. The editing was perfect and put to great effect here to show how both Hyun Woo and the man’s situations are similar and they both seek solace in a community that is “distanced” from them, either from an Internet community or a TV production team.

While the series has generally been solid thus far in exploring its themes and also in terms of its production value, I do hope the show can work on also making itself more compelling. I did find certain portions of the episode rather dull, perhaps because this episode’s main focus was on Hyun-Woo and Soo Yeon’s relationship without significant progression in the other relationships, which was unlike the first two episodes. There was also less comedic energy in this episode, possibly because we are now moving into more serious territory where the truth will be uncovered. I foresee that the ‘seriousness’ of the series will increase as we progress through the episodes and it will becoming increasingly challenging for the show to maintain its light-hearted tone. Nonetheless, if it does that well, that will be a true feat and prove that a series can explore a serious issue without taking itself too seriously.

In this episode, we get more hints that Soo-yeon is possibly cheating on Hyun-Woo, but still no confirmation. Hyun-Woo even deletes the email from the investigation agency. However, to some extent, whether Soo Yeon is having an affair or not doesn’t really matter. What this episode reveals is that there are some deep-seated issues in their marriage that need to be resolved and this is something I’m coming to appreciate about this show – it shows us the problems, instead of telling us.

The tell-tale signs of a marriage falling apart are all there. Hyun-Woo and Soo Yeon barely communicate, except about childcare arrangements. When he talks to her, she’s busy checking her phone, replying him in a very disengaged manner. There’s clearly a lack of intimacy between them as we always get scenes of either one of them sleeping with their son, but never sleeping in the same room. Their wedding anniversary means little to both of them and if not for his sister in law’s reminder, Hyun-Woo would have forgotten, hence his reaction to Soo Yeon forgetting their anniversary is unwarranted. The most important warning sign is the complete lack of honesty and fear of confrontation from Hyun-Woo – rather than directly asking about what he witnessed, he gets suspicious and contemplates the divorce option without thinking about how to work things out. He speaks to everyone and even hires an investigator when what he should have done is simply talk to her. It’s always a sign of a marriage falling apart when couples cannot confront thorny issues or have difficult discussions together. Even if Hyun-Woo does discover in the next episode that Soo Yeon is not having an affair, there’s still lots to work on in their marriage and I have some confidence the series will handle that well, given how it’s handled the depiction of their marriage thus far.

Another relationship I find particularly interesting is that between Joon-young and his wife, who has remained largely off-screen thus far. We get hints of problems in their marriage, but it’s never outrightly displayed. As the only one who’s been cheated on and divorced, Bo-young seems to be the voice of wisdom in the show and she can see immediately the problems when Joon-young says his wife isn’t bothered by his spending and that they don’t fight. The issue with both Joon-young and Hyun-Woo’s marriages is not that anybody has done anything wrong (yet), it is that nobody is doing the right things, which has resulted in their marriages growing cold.

It has been commented in several blogs, articles and forum posts that adultery is a very weighty topic and to choose the mode of a comedy to handle it is strange. However, in this episode, the use of comedy allows the show to make very controversial statements and explore this sensitive issue without being offensive. While there might be guys out there like Yoon-Ki, his character is so over the top that we know he’s not meant to convey the writer’s views on adultery. With that established, he is then used to amplify the extent to which men will go to engage in and hide their affairs. The scene with him talking to Bo-young and Joon-young about the tell tale signs of cheating is hilarious, made even more so because of the on-screen visuals which were brilliant! His wife, Ara, gets similar over-the-top treatment when we see how her suspicion manifests itself. Nonetheless, the series needs to handle the comedic elements very carefully. I found myself slightly disturbed by the scene with Yoon-ki deliberately ignoring his messages while Ana was around, fearful of whether it came from his lover. This could be a very common and real scenario encountered by couples with philandering partners, yet I wondered if we were supposed to be laughing at it. Overall though, I still think the show has handled the comedic elements well and even when not outrightly comedic, it explores serious issues (e.g. what constitutes cheating) in a light-hearted manner, which is conveyed sometimes very intelligently  through the camera angles.

One really nice touch about the show is its portrayal of the world of social media. We see Facebook, Instagram, web chats (with its multiple emoticons) and the world of internet forums. It continually juxtaposes the real world with social media postings, which is a fascinating exploration of the “unreality” of social media yet how we’ve grown to rely on it because of the anonymity and sense of artifice it can provide. While the seriousness and the “reality” of the topic of adultery does not allow the show to be too creative in terms of plot twists and cliffhangers, there’s no lack of creativity throughout in the direction and production of the show.

Ultimately, the second episode is certainly a step in the right direction and I’m keen to see what happens next. However, if there’s one thing I hope the show will go on to explore, that will be the “female” voice in all this. Thus far, we’ve predominantly seen the “male” perspective on adultery and heard the men’s views on this. I certainly hope we hear more from the wives in subsequent episodes. Not forgetting too the child’s voice in all this, as whenever adultery and divorce happens, it’s the child that suffers the most and we’re already seeing signs of Hyun-Woo’s son being affected by the tension between his parents.

Almost all the K-drama I’ve watched so far have always focused on the “falling in love” phase of relationships, which I believe is a common trend with dramas in general. Hence, “This Week My wife Will Have an Affair” is timely as I was keen to watch a drama that explores relationships in the context of marriage.

Based on a Japanese drama in 2007 with a similar title and also a true story, the premise of the show is simple enough and the premiere sets it out well. At its centre is Do Hyun-Woo (played by Lee Sun-Kyun) who discovers his wife, Soo Yeon (played by Song Ji-hyo) is possibly seeing someone else after they have been married for 8 years. This pushes him to go online to seek help from forums. Besides them, we have Joon Young (played by Lee Sang Yub) who is married, but flirting with Bo-Young (played by Boa) who has just come out of a divorce. We also have Yoon-Ki (played by Kim Hee-won) who plays a husband so skilled in his philandering ways that he teaches Hyun-Woo how to ensure his wife won’t be suspicious of his cheating ways. This is South Korea now, after the law against adultery was abolished (mentioned by Yoon-Ki) and now, it seems like adultery is common place. Although the drama certainly exaggerates matters, it may not be too far off from the truth as it was reported in the press that sales for condoms shot up following the abolishing of the law.

After watching several crime or action-focused dramas, I appreciated the dose of reality where we saw a married couple handling day to day matters like the picking up of the kids, bathing of kids, juggling of work/family commitments. While Hyun-Woo has the impression that his marriage is solid and he is a good husband, there lacks a certain intimacy in their interactions, which have almost become “business-like”, which is not uncommon in marriages. In fact, the problems may have begun as early as when they were married as the video of their marriage shows them hesitant to kiss, even on their wedding day. Later, when asked for the reasons for her divorce, Bo-Young shares with Hyun-Woo that she simply fell out of love with her husband and when things become too comfortable, that’s where the marriage falls apart. What I really liked was how true all these points are, especially from my interactions with marriage counsellors both personally and in my professional work. I’d be keen to see how the show proceeds to explore these issues.

Unlike other plot-driven dramas, I liked how the premiere focused instead on the internal world of Hyun-Woo – his thoughts, his suspicions, his confusions and the cacophony of “voices”. I appreciated the nice balance of comedy and seriousness when exploring this too. While we have no confirmation yet of his wife’s affair, it seems almost likely because for her not to be having an affair would compromise most of what was established in the premiere. Even if she hasn’t started having an affair, I believe she may at this point be considering one. While Hyun-Woo’s story was the main one, the show also deftly introduces and establishes the other relationships sufficiently, such that within the first hour we have a clear picture of where each male protagonist is in his/her marriage.

I have not decided if I’ll be following this series till the end, but I’m definitely keen to see how the next few episodes play out before I proceed further. Two key things I hope the drama will explore in more seriousness is what led to the relationship falling apart and the dynamics of the internet community. Nonetheless, this is a good start.